When Waiting is to "Wait-ie"
I just want to say this to you because I’m sure you’ll need this word at some point. And it’s ok if you do, that’s why I’m writing it.
I just need you to keep your faith. I know that it can be so hard to believe in something you cant see coming to fruition. I know faith is hard but God is sooo worth this. I promise you. I just know it – trust me.
I need you to know that I don’t know if God has someone for you but I need you to believe that and have hope in your future; have trust in his plan because whether or not you see it now, you will one day. All the pain you feel is shaping you, it’s bring you closer to Christ which is the most important thing when it comes to eternity and your soul. Everything else is just background noise. Try to fix your eyes on HIM even though your situation, the people, the place seems bleak and painful. You want things you may never get – I get it.
Just because God hasn’t given you those things doesn’t mean he wont – trust HIM. But if you never get it, that’s (somehow) for the better – you wont see that now but one day… one day you will. Try to keep your eyes on the bigger picture: God. Seek him out, read his word, cry out to him, talk to him, confide in him and I promise He will fill that void you feel. He will satiate your hunger, He will quench your thirst; He will provide what you need, even if what you need isn’t want you think you need.
He might feel far, but He’s not. It might seem like this pain will never end, but it will. This might seem like a punishment, but it’s a blessing. You’re being shaped; formed in the likeness of your savior and that will take pain. If you’re always asking to be shaped into the person He knows you can be and made more like God, you can’t expect to be turned into gold without fire.
Just remember that it’s all temporary: “you are but vapor, here one day and gone the next” (Jame 4:14). Compared to eternity in heaven, this is nothing. But that doesn’t mean that your feelings don’t matter – they do. I need you to feel them, and feel them hard because that’s the only way you are going to get through this and grow from it. You need to know that you will be better for this even though right now, you feel so much worse.
I know that nothing I say will really help right now, and that’s ok. But sometimes we need a reminder – just a seed planted, just something to…look forward too because you’re looking everywhere except where you are. Stop thinking about the past and the future – be where your feet are. Let yourself endure this so that your future will be brighter and your past will be a representation of how far you’ve come instead of a burden on your present.
I just want to remind you of hope. Because right now it sucks. It really hurts … I know it hurts – it probably will for a while, but it won’t hurt forever (even though it feels like it will). One day you will meet your savior face to face and all will be made right. All will be made clear: “for now you see with blurred vision but one day you will see clearly”.
I want, so bad, for this letter to be a note to you telling you that you will get what you want but that feels wrong. I can feel the holy spirit urging me not too. This doesn’t mean that you won’t get it but this means that you need to focus your eyes and energy and thoughts back onto Christ and not your own desires.
It’s ok to hurt but we need to remember what’s really important. God loves you more than you know and he’s holding you so so close (even if he feels far). You can do this. He feels your pain, so let it out, scream, cry, do whatever you need - but don’t forget to breathe.
Be Bold. Be Fearless. Be YOU.
(Song suggestion: play and listen to “you know me” by Bethel music).